I know too much!

I'm thinking about the many bible verses that have got into my head over the years. I'm thinking about what I've read in Psalm 119 about loving God's word, meditating on it day and night.

But now's the time for the next step!

In James 1 v.22 we read

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves.

Do what it says.

Colossians 3 v.23

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart,

as working for the Lord, not for men,

I'm thinking of how I act at work. I'm often moody and complaining! I've been thinking about why I'm not the same at work as I am at home. I'm thinking that at home my family KNOW my beliefs, at school many don't.

I'm thinking now is the time to put into action what God has been telling me!

If only I knew less about what is in God's word I wouldn't have any many things to try to do!

James

Our next bible sharing is from James. I thought I'd read through the whole book to get an overview. So on Saturday I climbed into bed at the end of the day and got as far as v18 in chapter 1. Then I decided I was too tired and turned out the light. There was something lurking there which needed me to think, but I went to sleep instead!

The next morning I decided to try again, but again got no further than v18 before I gave up.

Last night I decided I would read JUST to verse 18 and THINK about it! Digest it!

The first thing that hit me was the fact that trials and temptations are not from God! (v 13) He is incapable of putting those things in our lives. What he does do is to allow those things to enter our lives. If we give in to them, we are allowing ourselves to sin. (v 14 - 15) Only good and perfect things come from God (v 17).

When we face trials, when life just seems to get too much for us. We have a choice! We can either allow it to swallow us up. We can sit in the depths of despair and cry and blame God. Or we can turn towards God, give him our worries, our fears, our problems! (v 5 -6)

One thing I've taken away from my time reading Psalm 119 is that we need to love God's law! We need to meditate on it and just praise God!

If through all our problems of today we just praise God, (not for the problems! but praise him for who he is) then we will be lifted up.

We are always in God's presence, but when we praise him, he gives us the strength and wisdom to go through our lives. He holds our hand and guides us.

So today I want to start the day by saying...

I love an amazing God! He is the creator of all I am, of all I see. I am just one small person, yet he loves me! I love an amazing, awesome God, because he first loved me! He doesn't hide himself from me but he has made himself known to me. The God of all creation, a pure and holy God! How awesome to think he wants ME in his presence!!

It's so unfair!

Once again life it throwing stuff at me that I don't want! I could get so cross!!!

I went to visit a friend the other day and as soon as I sat down I began to cry! I didn't even know why. Thankfully she said that because I am a woman I'm allowed to cry, so she passed me the tissues. Odd how quickly the tears stopped!

We then sat and talked about what was bothering me and then I went on to say it's been a long time since I'd read any of Psalm 119 which we'd been studying individually so we could share when we met. (Does that make sense??)

The last thing I'd written was about 5 weeks earlier! from Psalm 119 v 103.

How sweet are your words to my taste,

Sweeter than honey to my mouth.

God's word gives us strength like sugar. The sweetness of God's word wil always soother our worries and life our spirit but we must take in God's word if it is to have effect. Receiving a box of chocolates is a great gift but if we are to gain the benefit of the sugar boost from them we need to eat them! Leaving God's word on our bedside table will not lift us! Taking it in, digesting it, is what we need to see us through our lives!

Who am I...

that you are mindful of me?

I awoke in the middle of the night and after a while logged onto the laptop. I was going to do a search on www.biblegateway.com for a phrase that was in my head, but my eyes glanced down the page and I spotted the "verse for today".

It was from Psalm 119 and reminded me that a friend and myself had been looking through Psalm 119 over the past couple of months. I wandered around the site for a while, but when I went back to the homepage the verse for the day had changed!

It doesn't matter. Jacqueline and I have come to realise that Psalm 119 can be summarised by saying that God's word is our life. It gives us all we need to live by, it brings us joy. We need to love God's word, to eat it greedily and to allow it to guide the way we live.

verse 175 states
Let me live that I may praise you,
and may your laws sustain me.

I was amazed that God drew me to this particular Psalm once again to show me the importance of getting his word into my life.

God cares for me! I'm struggling at the moment, but he places just the right word before me to guide me back!

Who am I that he cares so much? I'm his child!

Knowing What to Do

One of the most annoying things in life is knowing the solution to a problem but not using it!

Over the past couple of days my parenthood has struggled to cope with knowing what to do for the best. My eldest children have left home (or have they?). Rob has returned a week before his 18th birthday. Things didn't work out in Southport so he's come back. Laura is struggling at work and is questioning the direction her life is taking. As a result, each morning I wake to find her sleeping in her younger brother's bed (he's at camp this week).

Other problems are surfacing at an alarming rate and I'm beginning to feel bogged down with life.

The annoying thing is I know what I need to do! I need to give God some quality time! I need to sit down and read his word, spend time seeking his face and giving him praise. Finally, I need to hand over everything that is worrying me.

So why do I struggle to do this?? Why is it so hard to hand parenting problems to God and ask his advice? My mind is telling me that they are my children and my responsibility. But I'm God's child, his responsibility and he loves me to come to him and ask for help.

At the moment, my children haven't asked for help. What they are doing is spending time in my home. Maybe not always talking about their worries and fears, I feel I'm having to drag those out of them. But they ARE in my house. They are close to me. They are desperate for my love, for my hugs, for my presence. They know that at any time, when they are ready, they can talk to me. They may not like what I say in reply to their problems, but they value my opinion.

I need to make sure that I do exactly the same as my children.

I need to go home, sit in my Father's house and gain strength from his presence. Talk about my worries, my fears and ultimately, just trust him, relax and regain my peace.

Heaven

I've been challenged this week by a song called Heaven by a group called Mary Mary.

The line that's caught me off guard says
"And I pray that when I get there I'll meet everyone I know."

Now at first hearing that sounds great! But then I thought-

Do I really want to meet EVERYONE I know???

I can think of a lot of people I have known and some I still know that I will be glad I won't see again!

God loves everyone and his desire is for all mankind to worship him and be in his presence! Surely, if Christ lives in me, I should want the same!

Challenging thought! I know I should love everyone.... but love them so much I want to spend eternity with them???

Home at Last!

I've been looking forward to going to church this morning. I've missed 5 weeks of church with all the time away and I was excited to be with my friends again worshipping God in the church I attend.

During the worship I was thinking about how good it was to be back with God's people, worshipping him. Then I remembered I had spent half an hour meeting with God's people in Bath on the Sunday, and another student and I praised God's wonderful creation quietly during a session where we were told about the beauty of snowflakes.

The following week I met with over a thousand others at Bible week. Then last Sunday I worshipped with a small group local to Mum in Spain.

Although I have been away from my usual chruch for several weeks, my times of corporate worship have been varied, I have still met with God's people to worship him!

I've missed my bed! I've missed my husband, I've missed my kids and my home and decent cups of tea!

BUT

Although I have been in different places in the UK and in Spain, I have NEVER been out of God's presence. At any time I could just reach out and touch him. He has always been beside me, holding me and waiting for me to speak to him. His love and kindness has enveloped me throughout all my time away. My time away has never been a time away from Him! I have never missed being with an almighty, all powerful, every loving Father.

What a joy to know that wherever and whatever, God is always with us!

Time to go home

After almost 2 weeks in hot sunny Spain, enjoying good food and family, it's time to return to the normality of life in the UK.

Ok, so it's the summer holidays still and I'm not exactly returning to work, but I've got a lot of study work to do and also quite a lot of pre-term work in school. Once again my job description is changing slightly and I've got a change of classroom, so I need to prepare thoroughly for the new term if I am to be of any use to the students I teach this coming year.

It's been a good break here in Spain and having seen the excellent progress my mum has made through her recent illness I feel content to return to England.

So back to normal life. Back to the highly missed hubby. Back to a decent cup of tea!!!!

Another quiet day

We awoke to another cloudy day, but this time it was obvious the sun would soon be out! A little bit of shopping, a quiet glass of coke or fanta in the shade, then home for a short while.

Later we went out for a typical lunch in a truckers restaurant. For 9euros you get salad and bread and crisps to munch whilst deciding what to eat, then you are given a choice of about 5 starters, followed by a choice of 5 main courses followed by a choice of 5 deserts! The price ALSO included wine, beer or soft drinks and coffee afterwards!

By the time you've munched your way through the meal you are only fit for a siesta! No need for an evening meal either! I guess if you were a truck driver (none there this week as the quarries are on holiday) the meal would keep you going for the afternoon!

Part of me would love to come out here and live. But I guess I only see the place when I'm on holiday and I don't have the stress of work. For now, I'm glad for the place God has placed me to live and work. We have good friends, good teaching, almost automatic access to water, heating, food, internet, phones etc. Here in Spain these things are not always to be assumed. Yes the cost of living is cheaper - at the moment! But fuel costs are rising! Food prices are rising! House prices are rising.

I'll stick with my home in England and wait until God tells me to go elsewhere. Only by allowing God to direct my life can I rest.

Holy Spirit

One of the most interesting and stimulating things I gained from Bible week is the knowledge that the Holy Spirit is always present! It's so strange how you can know something but know really appreciate it! We were encouraged in the seminars to "tune in" to the Holy Spirit throughout the day for guidance and direction and wisdom etc.

It's really changed how I deal with little things. If something crops up and I'm not sure what to say, I ask quickly tune in and then relax. I trust the Holy Spirit to help with what I need to say or do.

meeting with God's people

This morning I drove Mum a few miles to a small gathering of God's people. Although there were only a few people there, the welcome was genuine for everyone (even us visitors!).

They are a good bunch of people and it was good to be with God's people worshipping an amazing God. Despite being amongst a small group of strangers, both Matt and I were able to just open our hearts and our mouths and worship as freely as we did at Bible Week where we worshipped amongst hundreds.

Often we feel restricted in our freedom to worship by those around us. But God wants us to bring glory to him in everything we do. This morning I'm sure our worship glorified God! I need to make sure everything else I do each day also glorifies the God who chose me and saved me!

Spannish Fiestas

This is a strange country!

Every village and town spends two weeks celebrating with fiestas. Huge parades, fancy dress, exciting floats, late night discos - starting at midnight! At the end of this, the town goes on holiday! Well the shops and bars shut for a month! So anything you want you need to hope the neighbouring village isnt in the middle of IT's holiday month! How odd!

But it's still a beautiful place! Last night we sat outside a bar and had a fantastic meal whilst watching the locals walk around the stalls down their main street. The atmosphere in Spain is far friendlier than in the UK. The village fiestas are for the locals and everyone gets involved.

warmer today

Last night we went to the local village and watched as they had their final fiesta night with a procession. Everyone was throwing sweets and giving away drinks. After the procession we went to a local bar and enjoyed some good spanish food!

The whole way of life over here is so different to the UK. It's so hard not to feel guilty about sleeping during the day, but it's the only way if you are to enjoy the colour and noise and I have to add, the friendliness, of the fiestas!

Today we've had a relaxing day at home, but this evening we have yet ANOTHER night out celebrating a couple's ruby wedding. Another late night with lots of excellent food!

So far today we've relaxed by the pool for a couple of hours and although it is cloudy I can still feel the sun beating down and changing the colour of my skin.

I'm thanking God for the clouds! The day we arrived the heat was unbearable for me, but with the clouds I am coping with the heat - just!

Try not to envy me here in Spain! heehee